LU Student Shares Powerful Testimony of Hurt, Healing and Hope

Editor’s Note: I remember when I met Tahjah Jolly at our hall scavenger hunt at the beginning of sophomore year, but we never shared more than a smile until I saw a post on her Instagram in July.

“Tahjah, a girl raised in abusive homes from age 5 until 17. A girl who was beaten if she made mistakes, didn’t eat her food, shoes weren’t tied,” she wrote in the post.

From that point on, I could not shake the fact that for a whole year, I lived in community with a girl I knew nothing about – a girl who has experienced pain I cannot comprehend – a girl who has a relationship with God the Father that people need to hear.

When I decided to start a column sharing people’s testimonies, Tahjah was the first person who came to mind. I reached out and heard a story I feel inadequate to tell. But we are all inadequate of God’s unconditional love, yet He gives it willingly.

This testimony is a relationship between Tahjah and God. I am but a messenger, hoping to give her story even a minuscule of the justice it deserves. 

Tahjah, thank you for your bravery. Thank you for opening my eyes to what God was doing on our hall last year. And thank you for allowing me to share your story with others. 

Tahjah Jolly was 5 years old when she encountered God for the first time.

“My mom was cleaning up the church for something, and I was sitting in the sanctuary by myself,” Tahjah said. “Even at such a young age, I was always praying. So, I remember I was just talking to the Lord in whatever little way that I could and the Holy Spirit just falling on me.”

She was also 5 years old when her mother married a man who was physically, emotionally, and verbally abusive to Tahjah, her mother and siblings.

“Literally the day that they got married, he just changed in such a dramatic way,” Tahjah said. “His true colors were revealed — who he actually was.”

When Tahjah was in middle school, her mother woke her up one morning telling her to quickly pack up her things. They escaped to a domestic violence home for nine months. But her mother met yet another man who was verbally and emotionally abusive – her senior year of high school, that man kicked Tahjah, and her family out of their house.

In addition to witnessing and receiving abuse, Tahjah watched her mother come near death on multiple occasions. When Tahjah was in second grade, her mother had a stroke and became ill. She was diagnosed with PTSD and conversion disorder, which caused her body to completely shut down and experience paralysis, blindness and other neurological symptoms when she became overwhelmed.

During periods of her life, Tahjah has been homeless, and her mother has been unable to work since her diagnosis. Scraping for money was a constant problem.

“She didn’t want us to know that we didn’t really have what we needed, so she would make things fun. I remember one day, she was like, ‘Hey I’m going to see which one of you guys can find the most change around the house,’” Tahjah said. “She made it into a game. But we didn’t realize it at the time that she was just trying to collect as much change as she could so that she could go buy bread and meat so we would have something to eat.”

After years of living through this abuse, sickness and poverty, Tahjah struggled deeply with her faith.

During her first year at Liberty, Tahjah would wake up with anxiety attacks during the night, but God spoke to her through hall leadership. Resident Assistant Abby Henry prayed with Tahjah every night before she went to bed. Throughout the year, Resident Shepherd Cami Dittmer invested in Tahjah, and discovered that she had built barriers between herself and God because of these situations.

“I was too afraid to address the pain that was in my heart. I was too afraid to say that this happened to me, and I am hurting from it,” Tahjah said. “In my head I was just like, ‘The Lord wants me to get over it, get over it, get over it.’ And one day Cami looked at me and she’s like, ‘Can you tell me where in the Bible the Lord says, ‘Get over it?’ And it just stuck with me. The Lord has never said once, ‘Get over it.’ It says He is the healer to the broken hearted.”

By the end of the year, her anxiety attacks at night went away, and she began to see the true heart of God as her Father. 

“I’m not whole completely. I’m still in the process of learning the love of God the Father, and it’s just a journey,” Tahjah said. 

Tahjah’s deep wisdom is evident through her story.

“Trust Jesus with your heart and with your emotions. Know that your heart is safe in His gentle hands,” Tahjah said. 

“Go to the Lord, 100 percent. Don’t let fear stop you. Don’t let worry stop you. Don’t let the lies of the enemy stop you. Because if you go to Him, He will literally transform your life. He will take something completely horrible and just use it for His good as He said He would.”

Jacqueline Hale is the Feature Editor. Follow her on Twitter at @HaleJacquelineR.